


Embrace the Past (Live for Now)

by ShowMeAHero



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Poe Dameron Hurts So Prettily, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Star Wars: The Force Awakens Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-08 20:04:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,022
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5511296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShowMeAHero/pseuds/ShowMeAHero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Finn and Poe both have a bit of healing they have to do before they're back up to 100%, but they'll help each other every step of the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Embrace the Past (Live for Now)

**Author's Note:**

> Guess I'm in Hell now.
> 
> Title taken from ["This Is the New Year" by A Great Big World](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kr4g0UK3Fas).

Poe’s vision blackens, burns around the edges, glows red, blurs before his eyes, and he tries to blink back the pain, but he struggles, and the corners of his eyes are singed, and his chest is scorched as he gasps for air. He tries to reach out, lash out at his enemy, but his body refuses to respond to his brain. He feels memories and thoughts getting forcibly dragged to their forefront of his mind, and he fights it with all of his strength. The pull only gets harsher, more fiery, and his mind seems to char and crisp under the grisly blaze of the Dark energy raking him over the coals. His back bows, and he takes shallow, sharp breaths, and his body is surrendered to someone outside of him, and he tries not to cry out-

-and a hand on his arm jerks him awake, and his chest heaves as he tries to catch his breath. He picks his head up from where it was resting against the back of the chair while he was sleeping, and Finn is watching him, face red and eyes worried.

“You were having a nightmare,” Finn whispers into the darkness. Poe pulls away from Finn to scrub his hands over his face, rubbing at his eyes and slapping at his cheeks. Finn watches from his medbay bed in silence, white sheets tangled around his waist as he sits up to monitor Poe as he gathers himself. Poe readjusts his position in the chair at Finn’s bedside, landing his socked feet on the floor next to his abandoned boots.

“Was it about crashing?” Finn asks softly. Poe shakes his head, running his nails over his scalp.

“No, it was-” The name of the First Order fellow who tortured his mind to get information catches in his throat,  _ Kylo Ren _ poisoning his mouth, turning his tongue sour. “Just. A nightmare. It’s not a big deal.” He leans back in his chair and dangles one arm over the edge of it, a forced position of unruffled serenity, a relaxed facade, and Finn reaches out for him. He cannot quite reach, so he leaves his hand in the middle space. Poe sighs and leans in closer, until Finn can grip his shoulder.

“You’ve been taking care of me,” Finn says, gesturing in the vague direction of his back, and the angry burn scar that drags deep and long close to his spine. “Let me take care of you.”

“It’s really not much,” Poe assures him. Finn lets go of his shoulder in favor of grabbing his hand, a favorite hobby of his. He runs his thumb over Poe’s knuckles. “Just what he did.”

“Kylo Ren?” Finn asks, and Poe nods. Finn hesitates, then brings Poe’s hand up to his mouth, lips brushing the back of it.

“That’s not nothing,” Finn tells him. “I know what Dark energy feels like when it’s in you. It’s not good. And the way he uses it-” Finn stops, seeing the blanched look on Poe’s face. “It’s not nothing. I’d be all fucked up if he did to me what he did to you.”

“I just prefer not to think about it,” Poe murmurs. Finn shuffles over carefully on his crisp, sterile-white sheets, and pats the spot next to him. He shoves over Poe’s coat where it sits, balled up, near his pillows, and Poe raises an eyebrow at him.

“Well, get in,” Finn says, unashamed, and Poe’s other eyebrow goes up, but he stands. Finn’s grip on his hand tightens, and he drags Poe down into the bed. The mattress is stiff with only a slight spring to it, but Poe shifts around until he is comfortably resting on his side. Finn moves slowly, but he eventually ends up on his side, as well, their noses an inch apart. Poe can feel Finn’s breath ghosting over his lips. Poe reaches down to pull the covers up over them both.

“I have nightmares,” Finn admits into the space between them. “Mostly where I have to go back to the First Order.” Finn keeps their fingers tangled, and Poe pushes their foreheads together.

“I won’t let that happen,” Poe assures him. Finn smiles.

“I know you won’t,” he replies, and Poe smiles back. “But I’m just telling you. I have nightmares, too. It’s okay.”

“I know.” Poe’s attention darts down to their joined hands, then traces up Finn’s chest, to his throat, then to his mouth. He meets his eyes again, eventually. “I just would rather not have them. Or think about it. Or remember it happening at all.”

Finn nods, disrupting both of their heads, the soft hypoallergenic pillowcases rustling under him. “You scared me.”

“Look who’s talking,” Poe says, “Mr. Slept-For-Five-Days.”

“I heard you came to sit with me before I woke up,” Finn murmurs. Poe grins at him, white teeth shining in the darkness.

“Of course I did,” Poe says. “If I’m not in the sky, it seems like I’m in here with you, most days.”

“Every day,” Finn replies, and Poe keeps smiling. “Do you think Rey is okay?”

“Yes,” Poe answers, without hesitation. “She’s okay, and you’re okay, and I’m okay. We’re going to get out of this one, Finn. We gotta believe that.”

“I believe that,” Finn promises, and they both hear the unspoken,  _ I trust you _ . Poe pushes their faces closer together, the tip of his nose pressing into Finn’s cheek. Finn exhales, and Poe matches him, even if his breath shakes a little, still uneven from his nightmare. Finn reaches up to settle his palm on Poe’s cheek, fingers spreading over his cheekbone, up into his hair, across his temple, to his lips. Poe inhales, and exhales again, deeply, more steady this time. Finn blinks in the darkness, then smiles, and Poe leans in to press a kiss to the corner of his lips, then full, Finn’s mouth warm under his.

“I’ll keep you safe,” Poe promises, and Finn nods.

“Awesome,” Finn replies, “thanks,” and Poe laughs, tossing his head back against the pillows.

“Anytime,” Poe says, and Finn digs his head into Poe’s throat, yawning.

**Author's Note:**

> You can follow me on Twitter at [@nicoIodeon](https://twitter.com/nicoIodeon) or on Tumblr at [andillwriteyouatragedy](http://andillwriteyouatragedy.tumblr.com/).


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